207: Building Your Dream Outside of Medicine with Tiffany Moon, MD

Welcome to The Wealthy Mom MD Podcast, a podcast for women physicians who want to learn how to live a wealthy life. In this podcast you will learn how to make money work for you, how you can have more of it, and learn the tools to empower you to live a life on purpose. Get ready to up-level your money and your life. I’m your host, Dr. Bonnie Koo.

Hey everyone, welcome to another episode. So today I have a special guest, many of you may know who she is already, Dr. Tiffany Moon, but if you don’t she’ll introduce herself. And one of the reasons why I wanted to have her come on is, well, there are so many reasons. Number one is I just love interviewing amazing female physicians who have done different things because I know it’ll be an inspiration for you and to hear a bit about their story because I know a lot of you will be able to relate in terms of how she grew up and the struggles she’s experienced being a physician. 

And also, she is having a conference for female physicians, but you don’t have to be a physician. I would say it’s really for any sort of female professional who may struggle a bit with work/life balance or kind of feels like she’s a bit stagnant in her current career and who likes a little bit of luxury because that’s what Tiffany Moon is all about. 

And so we’re going to be talking about her conference, which is November 8th through 10th in Dallas, and then obviously all of you know that I have a conference. But what I love is that there are so many in-person events ranging from smaller retreats to larger conferences, like 100 to 200 people, that are available. And I just really want to encourage you to attend one of these in person. You will get so much out of it, we talk about what’s so magical about these in-person events with other women, you’re going to find your tribe and so many other things. 

And so I just really encourage you to find one and to attend one. For my conference, which is February 2025 in Hawaii, it’s not open for registration yet because it’s pretty far away, but we do have a waitlist and you need to get on it because it’s the only way to get $500 off and to get first access to registration and to get a room at the group rate. 

The Miraval conference we had earlier in March 2024 sold out in a month and we know that this conference is going to sell out really quickly and we only reserved a relatively small block of rooms at the Four Seasons at 50% off. And so you definitely want to be able to get a room so that you can stay there with us. You’re not required to stay, but I don’t know why you wouldn’t want to stay. 

And so the only way to get that $500 off and to get access to a highly discounted room is to be on the waitlist. And so that’s wealthymommd.com/conference, we’ll link all of that in the show notes. 

If you can’t make it, I know it’s a fair amount of distance for a lot of you, then Tiffany’s conference in Dallas is going to be pretty easy to get to no matter where you are in the country, that’s the beauty of Dallas, Texas. And so without further ado, I can’t wait for you to meet Tiffany and to learn more about her and what she’s up to. 

Bonnie: Hi, Tiffany, welcome to the show. 

Tiffany: Hi. Nice to see you. 

Bonnie: I’m so excited that you’re here.  I know we’re going to talk about some really cool stuff and people are going to get so much value from today, but why don’t you introduce yourself for those listeners who don’t know who you are? 

Tiffany: Hi, everybody. My name is Tiffany Moon, I’m a board certified anesthesiologist, social media personality, ex-real housewife of Dallas, and mom of twins. 

Bonnie: All right, so we need to go through those one by one. So what does a social media personality mean? 

Tiffany: I think now it’s like they call it a content creator, but basically I feel like one of my jobs is to create content on social media for my followers. And that can be in a variety of topics, anywhere from funny, relatable meme type things on parenting and being a working mom or advice on work/life balance, professionalism, things like that. But it started off as a hobby and then it became a job. 

Bonnie: Yeah, that’s actually good to know because most of my listeners probably don’t own a business, although I think quite a few do. And yeah, social media takes work, even when it doesn’t even look – I was going to say like for me, for example, I feel like I definitely don’t put anywhere near as much work as you do, but it’s still a lot of work, right? So I can’t imagine what it’s like. I know you and I have had some side conversations about how to up my social media game. 

Okay, and then we’re going to talk about the whole real housewife of Dallas thing. Well, there’s so much I want to talk about, but why don’t we start with, tell us like, how did you go from anesthesiologist to, like how did that relate to social media personality or maybe influencer? Is that like the old name or? 

Tiffany: Yeah, influencer kind of has a dirty connotation. Now it’s a content creator. 

Bonnie: Content creator, okay. 

Tiffany: Yeah, and then I say social media personality. So call it whatever you want, but it’s basically interacting with your followers on social media platforms. 

Bonnie: Yeah. So how did Tiffany Moon anesthesiologist go from being in the operating – although you still practice, right? But how did that all relate? Because I’m sure people listening are just going to be fascinated. Like how did that even happen? And so we want to just hear about your journey and any lessons along the way, basically. 

Tiffany: Yeah, both of those things, as well as being an entrepreneur kind of happened accidentally. And what I mean by that is I never sought to be a real housewife, I’ve never sought to be an influencer, but opportunities presented themselves. And I was like, you know what? That’s interesting, I’m going to give it a try. And sometimes you throw things at the window and see what sticks, right? Or try things. Because how will you know if you like something or not until you actually try it? So that’s how most of those things happen. 

I guess in chronological order, I did social media first. I really did it because I found it difficult as an adult to make a lot of new friends and have a community of people who liked the same things that I liked. And I don’t know, I was just having a hard time. I felt very isolated. You know, I work in an operating room all day, I see just a handful of people every day. My patient is asleep, the surgeon’s operating, it’s not like I’m really conversing with a lot of people. 

And I kind of found an escapism in social media and building my own community and starting to grow my following. The Real Housewives presented itself because I’m big in the charity world here in Dallas. And one of my friends was a Real Housewife since I think season two. So she was a seasoned housewife. 

But I’d see them over and over again taping at different events that she had had throughout the years. And Real Housewives is sort of like a sorority, they’re always recruiting for their next batch. And the producers had said to her, you know, we think your friend Tiffany is really interesting. Like would she be interested in being a housewife? So she asked me to have a meeting with the producers. 

And the first time she asked me to do that, I was like, are you smoking crack? Like I have no interest in being a Real Housewife. At the time I was working full time as an anesthesiologist, running clinical trials, I had twin toddlers at home. And then she was like, hey, you want to talk to casting? And I was like, no, no, I do not. But thank you for thinking of me. 

But she kept asking over and over and over. And something weird happened where in 2020 I was like, you know what? I will talk to the casting director. They just kind of wore me down and I guess my curiosity got the best of me. And so I talked to the casting director, one thing led to another. You go through rounds of interviews, so to speak, for housewives. 

And then one day in early 2020, they were like, hey, Tiffany, we want you to be the newest Real Housewife of Dallas. 

Bonnie: So you said two things that I think are really important to highlight. And it’s a common theme whenever I have women physicians on the podcast, is this – And I’m curious around when in your career this happened, when you said you felt a little isolated and were looking to connect with, basically make friends, right? 

And I think that’s just such a common theme among female physicians, is at some point we feel really isolated, lonely. It’s kind of the same thing I hear over and over again. And so I’m curious, like how many years after residency were you starting to feel that way? 

Tiffany: I would say somewhere in the seven to nine year range, because things like that it’s not like one morning you wake up and you decide that you’re not fulfilled and this job that you have isn’t all that it was cracked up to be. You know, it’s sort of like a slow process and there were a number of things happening at work. And I felt that I was being treated unfairly. And, you know, it’s like things that happen over time. 

And then one day I was like, you know what? I don’t think I want to work full time 100% for the rest of my life. There are other pursuits in life that I want to have time for, and I simply can’t do those things when I’m working full time. And I mean, full time was like 1.0 FTE feels more than one 100% of the time because we have to take calls. 

So I was taking overnight trauma calls, liver transplant calls. So it was like on some weeks, 50 to 60 hours a week with twin toddlers at home. And you really don’t have the mental bandwidth to do anything else if you’re working that much and trying to raise a family. There’s no time to make friends. There’s no time for hobbies. There’s no time for leisure reading. And I was just like, I don’t want to do this anymore. I’m not happy. 

Bonnie: Yeah. Well, first of all, kudos for you to even realize that, because I think it’s becoming, okay, I almost said the word trend. That’s not what I meant. But I love that women are sort of putting their foot down earlier and earlier and not waiting until 20 years into practice to realize that this is not the life that they signed up for and also just questioning the paradigm. 

Actually, I’m not sure exactly when this podcast comes out, but a few podcast episodes ago I did one on, actually it was my talk on entrepreneurship for my conference and I talk a lot about how this whole like do this one job, AKA medicine, full-time forever, like it’s just not working for many reasons. Part of it is medicine, but also just the paradigm of the same one career for the rest of your life. It just doesn’t work anymore because we’re all going to live for so long and that’s just kind of boring to have just one thing that you’re really good at. 

Okay, and then the second thing that sort of piqued my curiosity was when you mentioned that opportunities presented themselves and you were like, huh, why not? And so that’s something that I think is really important, is that were you always like open minded and open to things? Or was it sort of like was it something you were always sort of like that type of person or was it like a series of events that kind of led you to exploring new options or both? 

Tiffany: No, I would say it was more the latter, a series of events that led me to be more open minded. I think in my 20s up to my early 30s, I was sort of one track mind. Like we’re so conditioned to be like school, test, school, exam, board exams and certifications and fellowships and all that sort of thing. 

And so when I finished residency I was 28. So then I got a job as an attending, the same job that I have now. And I think it was around like six, seven years I started to be like, is this all it’s going to be? And I think one of the moments that caused me to think that was when I was early promoted from assistant to associate professors. I was promoted after six years, which for most academic anesthesiologists is considered early. 

But I had published like two dozen papers and had a number of leadership positions. I mean, I had been working my ass off for the first six years and I think it showed. And I thought that when I got that promotion that like, you know, there would be like glitter and puppies and rainbows and unicorns. And they told me I got promoted and I was like, oh, cool. And my husband took me out to dinner and we ordered like a $200 bottle of wine and we celebrated. 

And it felt nice to be recognized for having worked so hard. But then I was like, okay, what’s next? How many more clinical trials can I run? How many more papers can I write? What’s the next thing so that I can be promoted early from associate professor to full professor? And it was like I celebrated for like one day and then got back to the grind. 

And it just, I was thinking about it and I was like, gosh, I don’t really feel any different, nor do I feel satisfied. And I felt like something was missing. And for like two years, I could not figure out what the missing thing was but I tried many things to fill it. I tried to fill it, like that void, with social media. That wasn’t it, but I like social media and I made a lot of new friends. So I was like, oh, I’ll keep doing that. 

I tried to fill it by being a real housewife. Do not recommend that if you feel a void in your life, that you go on reality TV. That was definitely not the answer. I did one season and I was like, no, I will not be joining that circus again. 

And then I filled it with other things which I think stuck, like connection, like making new adult friends that are truly friends and not like superficial, hey, girl, how’s it going? Oh my God, your dress is so cute, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Like real true friendships where when I’m struggling or I’m feeling down, I can call you and say like, hey, Bonnie, I had a really bad day or, you know, I’m trying to do this life coach course and it’s just such a slog and I’m not sure I can be a life coach. Like maybe this isn’t the right thing for me. You know, just to have those conversations. 

And I guess the punchline or whatever is like connection over perfection is what I’m trying to – Every time I have something new and I catch myself trying to make it perfect before I put it out there, I stop myself and say the goal is connection over perfection. So sometimes I put out imperfect things all the time because not putting it out and waiting to hold it until it’s absolutely perfect, by then it’s like too late. I’ve missed the moment and it’s not worth it. 

Bonnie: Oh, I love that. So I think you and I both follow Brooke Castillo, and one of her quotes is something like B minus work changes the world. And I remember one of your reels like showing different grades and what they mean to Asian families. 

Tiffany: Oh yeah, the Asian grading scale. 

Bonnie: And what does B mean again? 

Tiffany: A is average. B is below average. C is can’t eat dinner. And F is find new family. 

Bonnie: I just seriously was like, oh my God, that’s like so accurate. 

Tiffany: I know. I don’t think I’ve ever made a B minus like in my life. I mean, maybe like on a paper, but not as a final grade, you know?

Bonnie: Yeah.  

Tiffany: But I agree, and it’s like we’re all just striving to be so perfect. And it’s like for what? For what? 

Bonnie: Yeah, for the grade. For like the position, the title. And then you get there and you’re like, huh? 

Tiffany: I know, you get there and it doesn’t feel like the pot of gold that you were promised for slogging it through. You know, for all the times we were studying and my roommate in college was like out partying and doing all those things and I’m like literally pulling an all nighter for organic chemistry. 

And then you get to the end of your journey, supposedly the finish line, and you kind of look around and you’re like, is this it? 

Bonnie: Yeah. I mean, this is like such a common theme. And then the question is, what do you do when you have that sort of realization, right? And I think, you know, so we’re talking about the arrival fallacy. And then money’s part of that, too, right? Because I think part of it’s like, okay, once I become an attending, then I’m going to make X amount of money and then life will be so much easier. 

Because during medical school most people don’t have a lot of money and it’s like a big deal. For example, I went to school in New York City and I remember I was at Columbia. So it was like the North Pole of Manhattan. So if I went out late at night and I had to take a cab home and that was like over $30, like that was a big deal I remember, right? It’s like, oh, I can’t do that every weekend. But taking the subway late at night, especially to where I was, was not really a safe option. 

And then you become attending and you’re like, oh my God, life’s going to be so much easier. And then you make a lot more money. And then you’re like, I still feel poor. At least that’s how I felt. And so I don’t know how you grew up money wise, and both of us being from Asian families, there’s all these commonalities among sort of Asian immigrant mentality. So can you tell us a little bit about that in terms of how you were brought up? Like what were you taught to believe about money and how has that changed now? 

Tiffany: You know, there’s a lot to unpack there. So my parents came to America without me because they came on student visas and left me with my maternal grandparents who raised me for a few years. I moved to America when I was about six years old. So I was put in first grade without knowing any English. It was terrible. 

We lived in a one bedroom apartment, and my parents had the bedroom and I had the living room, which was my AKA bedroom, with just a mattress on the floor, like no bed frame. And they were students. I think we qualified for the free lunches at school, but my dad had too much pride for us for me to take them up on that. And so every day I was given a dollar and twenty five cents because I remember it was a dollar bill and a quarter for lunch to buy lunch at school. 

And for me, money was a contentious topic growing up because we didn’t have any. And I often would hear my parents in their bedroom, which was just a wall away, arguing about money. You know, why did you buy this or we can’t do this. And after they got their degrees, every time we could, we would move to a slightly nicer apartment in a better part of town. 

And when I was 11 years old we moved into a freestanding house, like a house with a garage and a driveway. And I just thought that we had made it. Like I thought that that was the American dream. But no, I grew up with a lot of thoughts around money, mainly that we had a scarcity mindset around money. I heard my parents fighting a lot. 

And every time I wanted to do something, I would always be reminded that money doesn’t grow on trees and don’t be ungrateful. And I would ask for like an Abercrombie t-shirt because that’s what everyone was wearing in middle school. And not only was I told no, but then I received a 30 minute lecture about how ungrateful I am to be even asking for that because my parents work so hard and I don’t know anything and I’m a spoiled brat and all these things. 

So I feel like trauma might be a slightly strong word, but I’ll go ahead and say it. I have a lot of trauma surrounding money and the way that I was taught about money growing up. 

Bonnie: Yeah. I mean, I do remember living in a one bedroom apartment and I had a brother who’s about a year and a half younger, but we all just slept in the same room. I remember the beds were just all smushed up together, like in a row. 

Tiffany: Oh my gosh, like Willy Wonka and the chocolate factory when all the grandparents just sleep in one bed together. 

Bonnie: But yeah, it was literally, like I still have a visual of it was just the beds all like, because a room isn’t really meant to fit four beds. 

Tiffany: It was like one big slumber party. 

Bonnie: It was. Yeah, so I remember that. That was when I was in preschool/kindergarten. It’s interesting the random images that we remember from childhood. I do remember moving into, actually it was attached to another house but it was basically a freestanding house. And I remember thinking like, wow, this was amazing having a lawn, et cetera. Like it was a big deal when that happened. 

Tiffany: And then my dad would complain about having to mow the grass and like something would be broken and all that stuff, you know? 

Bonnie: Yeah. There’s always pros and cons to owning and renting. It’s funny. I’m going to have a future episode on renting versus buying and why I love renting, at least for now. 

Okay, so how have things changed since you started having a lot more money? Like, was there like a bit of a mind F when that started happening or do you still have – Just tell us all the things. 

Tiffany: Well, when I saw my parents arguing about money, and I was a figure skater when I was little, but it’s a very expensive sport to be on the ice and have private lessons and inter competitions. And you have to have a new outfit for every competition. And basically I felt that my experience as a figure skater was not as good because I was poor. Like I didn’t get ice time and I didn’t get private lessons and stuff. 

And so when I was a little girl, and I distinctly remember this, like being 10 years old I said to myself, when I grow up I’m going to work so hard that I never have to worry about money and my future children can take whatever private lessons they want. Such a weird thing for like a 10 or 11 year old to think, but I distinctly remember thinking that. 

And then as I went through school I always was a hard worker, even in medical school after tests when other people were going out to drink like on Fridays and Saturdays, I got a side job as a cocktail waitress at a bar to make money. 

Bonnie: Wow. 

Tiffany: Yeah, and I was using that money to basically have a good lifestyle. Like go out to eat occasionally and save up. I think I bought a Gucci purse when I was in medical school. I mean, that’s silly. You know, some would have said just don’t buy the Gucci purse and then you don’t need to have the cocktail job. But I never had a problem with working hard. 

And so when I went through residency and then became an attending and finally had all this money, my MO was like, you know what? I’m going to enjoy myself because I have worked so hard to get here. And all this delayed gratification, which anyone who’s been through the medical training process in America understands delayed gratification. But I was like, I’m going to live it up. 

So I bought all the things, got a nice place, and started flying first class. And perhaps it was a little early to do that, but I’ve always kept up with my spending. And by that, I mean like I didn’t go into massive debt. I didn’t take out any additional loans. I actually paid back all my student loans within the first five years that I became an attending. I just paid them off early. 

To me, money is such a weird construct. It’s like you can’t take it with you. I don’t want to leave my kids with like millions of dollars where they’re not motivated to do anything in their lives. And I’m sort of like, just spend it. Like if I’m ever shopping with anyone and they’re like, should I get this or should I not? I’m like, just get it. Just buy now, think later. I’m so bad. 

I’m such an enabler when it comes to having nice things because for me, I grew up with so much scarcity that I feel like now I’m overdoing it in terms of the abundance and buying things and treating myself. But hey, you only live once and I don’t feel bad about it. 

Bonnie: Yeah. So it’s funny that you mentioned you had a job during medical school. I had a very temporary job working at a vegan restaurant in New York city. And I wasn’t a waitress, but I was like the person who took the pickup or delivery orders and I would pack the bags and stuff like that. 

But I didn’t last long because I was like, I cannot do this. Like in terms of just the amount of time because it was also across the city and it wasn’t easy to get to. So it was a lot of time just getting there because it was on the East side. And in New York city, going east to west is not easy, tight? So I had to go downtown and go to the east side. And so I just remember thinking like that. 

So most people would not have a job during medical school. Most people would not recommend it. But I also love that, because I think it’s really important to mention that you didn’t spend more than you were making because that’s a really important habit to have at a young age. I did not have that habit. I always spent more than I made. 

And I always find it fascinating depending on how you grew up because I grew up in a family that didn’t have a lot of means, but I still was an overspender. But I think I did that out of wanting to have nice things and feeling like, why can’t I have those things or like wanting that and so spending above my means. 

I didn’t really go into debt until, well, I guess it actually started in college probably. But I did have a job in high school where, back then I didn’t have a credit card, so if you ran out of money in the bank account, it was gone. There was nothing you could do. So I never did that. 

But I’d take out, like I remember going to the bank and being able to take out like 40 bucks to go to the movies was like a big deal. Ooh, I’m going to go to the ATM and take out $40 and it’s like that’s going to pay for movies. I could pay for my friend and we could get popcorn and more. 40 bucks was like, maybe the equivalent of like maybe a hundred dollars now. 

Tiffany: Right. 

Bonnie: In terms of spending power, you know? And so it’s just interesting how, because what I’ve seen just from all the clients I’ve coached is like, you could grow up with less means and that could look like 20 different things as an adult. It’s not like there’s a consistent way it shows up, right? For a lot of people, it does motivate them to make a lot of money and choose something like medicine that not only makes a lot of money, but also is air quotes, “stable,” which we know isn’t the case as much as it used to be. 

And so you have like and then people who are, I’m sure you know doctors who are in debt and have, or maybe you don’t know, a lot of doctors don’t –  There are doctors I meet in their late forties or even fifties who have nothing saved or invested. Like very little saved or invested and they literally have to work till 90 and they get to a point where they’re just like, oh crap, I better do something about it. 

It’s just so easy. I guess what I’m trying to say is it’s so easy to spend all the money that you’re making and not saving for the future. So how have you balanced that? 

Tiffany: Part of it has been forced because my work has like a mandatory 403 B and they match like, it’s like 6 or 7%, something like that. So I checked my account the other day, I’ve been in attending for 12 years and I hardly ever log in because it’s just in some like mutual fund that I don’t actively manage, And I logged in to my Fidelity and looked at the balance and I was like, oh, I actually have some retirement money. 

And then my husband and I also have a private wealth advisor that we give money to and they manage it because I don’t know how to do all that fancy stuff with investments. But I do think that it’s really important to put some money aside for a rainy day fund, retirement, all those things. 

It baffles me that doctors do what you said, which is like spend everything they make and then they can never stop working, you know? 

Bonnie: Yeah. Well, and I think also when, and this is not just a doctor thing, but I think part of it is lack of money education, not understanding certain things. But I think most people obviously know that they need to put money aside and invest and grow it. But I think unfortunately we don’t talk enough about money. 

But the good news is, you know, because I have a lot of clients who I meet, in their 40s, 50s, whatever, and they think it’s too late. And the good news is money is not made linearly because if that was true, you’d basically be effed if you didn’t start saving money at a certain age and that’s just not true. 

Actually, remember I was telling you that I went out to dinner last night with a few female doctors in the area and one of them, she told me that when she turned 50 her and her husband, also a physician, basically realized that they had really nothing set aside and that they would have to work till 90. 

And I don’t know the situation that got them there, but basically she decided to take radical responsibility for her finances because I think that’s actually – And when I saw that term, I don’t know if she said it or I just thought of it when she was talking. 

And I was like, that’s really what I want to be teaching my people, is like radical financial responsibility. Because once she did, like within three years, I don’t know her actual, but she told me all the properties she owns now, like it’s clear that within a few years. 

And then she told me that, you know there’s like that real estate thing where you can write off your active income? 

Tiffany: Right. 

Bonnie: I guess the first year, they were able to write off her husband’s entire doctor income. And he was like, is this legal? 

Tiffany: Yup, it is legal and then you’re not paying taxes on that income. 

Bonnie: Yeah. So her story was just so inspiring, like starting at age 50 when she realized that things were not going well because of just the financial choices. And then within three years, just changing it around and starting all these businesses, like to me that was just so inspiring because I think it’s so easy to be like, oh, it’s too late and there’s nothing I can do now. I’m going to have to work till 90, et cetera. 

So, that kind of actually leads us to the next thing I want to talk about is how important it is to find your people and to go out and do things. Like even last night I was like, you know you have those days where you just don’t want to do anything. You just kind of like chill. And it wasn’t like a rainy day, I just didn’t feel like leaving the house. 

And then I was like, you know, but I kind of made myself go because I just feel like you just don’t know who you’re going to meet. Just a random conversation could just give you an idea. And actually I know that I wouldn’t have gained this information if I didn’t take the opportunity. And also it takes effort, it does take effort to leave the house and if you have kids, like arrange all that stuff, right? 

And so that’s one of the reasons why I know that you created your upcoming conference. So tell us what, well, tell us about the conference and tell us what was like the impetus to actually create one. 

Tiffany: My work gives me CME funding to go to a conference every year. And so for 2024, I was looking for which conference am I going to go to? And I wanted something that was geared toward women physicians, but that wasn’t talking about the practice of medicine because no offense, but I don’t need to learn how to do anesthesia. Like I’m good for now. I go to the ASA. I speak at all those meetings and stuff. 

I wanted somewhere where we could talk about the softer side of medicine, like negotiation, marketing, communication, how to start a podcast, how to turn your expertise into a book. Like these are the things that I want to learn, but there’s no conference for that. I know because I tried, I Googled it. 

And I was talking to my husband in February of this year and telling him like, oh, I don’t know which conference I’m going to go to. I really wish that there was a conference that had all these things and dynamic speakers and breakout sessions. And he looked at me and he was like, why don’t you just make your own conference? 

And I was like, honey, are you insane? Like, I have no idea how to plan a conference and do you not see me over here already so busy with all these papers on my desk and I don’t get to spend enough time with you and the girls and all this stuff. And he’s like, no, I’m serious. Like I always hear you saying that you want to do something like this. And he’s like, so why don’t you just do it? 

So I reached out to Sonny, of course, I feel like all roads lead back to Sonny. And I don’t think that I would be planning this conference if it were not for her, because I had so many limiting beliefs about why I could not possibly plan a conference in less than a year’s time. 

And I said, well, what if this? And what if nobody registers? And what if I put down all these deposits and I lose money? What if people laugh at me? What if I price it too high? And she was like, what if? And I gave her all these reasons for why it possibly could not work out. 

And she said, but what if it does? What if you put on an amazing conference with all the speakers that you talk about, with all the breakout sessions, with all the networking and time for people to just socialize and people come up to you and afterwards tell you that it was a transformative experience or life changing for them? And I was like, I don’t even, I can’t even imagine that because I’ve in my mind just been thinking about all the reasons that it couldn’t work. 

And she really encouraged me to think it through. And then in March, I was like, you know what? I’m going to do it. And so once I decide that I’m going to do it, then I’m really going to do it right. Like in February, I was still like, is this possible? So I announced that I was going to have LeadHer Summit on International Women’s Day, which was March 8th. 

We literally made my website in 48 hours and put it up there. And it’s not beautiful, but it is functional. It has information on there, and that was the purpose of the website.

Bonnie: And you can click a button. 

Tiffany: And you can click a button and you can type in your email and say, add me to your list so that I can get updates. And now I’m in full conference planning mode. I mean, I already have like 25 amazing speakers. And I thought to myself when I reach out to my friends who I would like to come speak, probably half of them will say yes. But it was like 80%. And the 20% that said no, it was basically due to a schedule conflict that they have something else that weekend and not because they didn’t want to come support. 

And I was honestly very, very overwhelmed by how willing my friends were to come support me in this endeavor. I’m like, hey girl, you know, I’m planning my own conference. I would love to have you as a speaker. You could talk about X, Y, and Z. I think that it would be beneficial to you, to X, Y, Z. And then I really want to see you. 

And I basically curated the speakers and topics based on what I want to hear. Like I made a conference that I would want to attend. So people always ask me like, oh, who’s your target demographic? And I’m like, it’s me. Like mid-career women, maybe feeling a little meh about their job or they want to start a side hustle or do something a little bit different, right? Or just level up in the things that they’re already doing. 

So yeah, that’s a really long winded answer to how I came up with the LeadHer Summit. 

Bonnie: Yeah. Well, there are so many just like lessons that we can just tease out from what you just said. The first thing is like, I think it’s fascinating, it’s so simple. Like you have an idea and then you make it real, right? And all of us have done this. Like all of us wanted to be a doctor at some point and we made it happen. 

And so like you saw, like as soon as you made a decision, you said within 48 hours you got a website. Like as soon as you decide, the actual pieces don’t actually take, depending on the piece obviously, but like putting up a website saying, hey, this is happening. Like that’s just like pretty much like a very easy, fast turnaround sort of thing to do. 

And how has it been for you to have this idea and then have it start to become reality? Like, has that been wild? Because I remember thinking that was wild when I first started doing stuff like this too. 

Tiffany: No, it’s surreal because we opened up registration and it started trickling in and people were registering and like swiping their credit card. And I said, oh my gosh, I can’t believe it’s really happening, because I still had a nagging sense in the back of my head like, oh yeah, I made a website and I have a registration and I have these different tiers of tickets or whatever. 

But if I put it out there and nobody registers, I’ll just be like, just kidding, I didn’t really mean to plan this summit. That was just, I don’t know what I was thinking. And then just cancel everything and go back to my ho-hum every day. 

But people registered. I mean, I had a few at first and then double digits and I was like, oh my gosh, it’s really happening. It’s crazy. 

Bonnie: And people want to come, because some of my friends registered and they all, they messaged me and they were like – Actually I had two of my friends message me and they’re like, oh my God, I just signed up. I’m so excited, it looks amazing. 

And so I just think it’s like the best feeling in the world when you put something out there and people pay you money for it. To me it’s wild in the best way. 

Tiffany: It’s wild. I mean, I have so much gratitude for the women who have signed up already because in some ways they’re sort of giving me the courage to continue because I was scared to put myself out there. And then when people started registering, I was like, oh my gosh, it’s becoming real. 

And I really, really want to make this an amazing conference. I mean, I’m hoping that if it goes well, that maybe we can make it an annual thing, but I need people to sign up for the first one. And I don’t want to just take people’s money and not give them value for it. Of course not. Like I want people to come and be like, that was a good conference. And like Tony Robbins says, like create a raving fan or whatever he says. 

And I want people to go back to their communities of women and say like, next year, 2025, let’s all go to LeadHer Summit and bring other women with them. So I’m hoping. 

Bonnie: Tell us what do you want an attendee to walk away with after attending your conference? 

Tiffany: I want the attendees to feel empowered. I want them to feel inspired because we have so many amazing speakers, and it’s not just the speakers, but it’s like the other attendees. Some of the meetings that I’ve had, the speakers were okay, but really I made a new friend because they were sitting at my table and now we’re really close and we just hit it off. 

But to walk away with the energy and the empowerment that comes from being in a room with hundreds of other professional women who are also trying to level up in their personal and professional lives, because there’s an energy that’s created. 

And if you capitalize on that to use it to your advantage, whatever the next phase of your life may be, maybe you want to write a book, start a podcast, start a side hustle, invest in real estate, improve your financial education so that you’re not working a J-O-B until you’re 90. Like whatever it is, I feel like the attendee is going to capture something from the summit to use for their own lives. 

Bonnie: Yeah. I mean, that’s why I love conferences, whether as an attendee or even as a speaker. And when I do speak, and I don’t usually go to a lot of the sessions, I just hang out and talk to people because I feel like that’s where the magic is and the conversations and like, just, you just don’t know, exactly what you said, who’s going to be at your table and who you might connect with. 

To me, it’s almost like, oh, what’s going to happen? Like I’ve been to enough conferences now where I just know something magical is going to happen and you don’t know what or how, and it might not even be there, it might be later. But I just know at least one magical thing, if not like five or 10 are going to happen just because I put myself there. 

So we do attend a lot of in-person things, what would you say to someone who would love to do this but maybe, because there’s also a lot of women physicians who they haven’t left their family for something like this, except maybe going to, is it the ASC? Is that what yours is called? 

Tiffany: Oh, the ASA is like our annual conference. 

Bonnie: ASA, yeah. So like ours is the AAD. Maybe they’ve only done a meeting like that. And so what would you say to that woman who would love to go, but is having maybe some mom guilt about leaving? 

Tiffany: I mean, this is Friday morning to Sunday at noon, and I welcome the potential attendees to carve this time out for themselves because if you can’t let go of your mom guilt and carve out three days to come to a conference where it’s going to energize you and give you the inspiration and empowerment to do something, we need to examine your life. You know what I’m saying? 

You need to be able to do this for yourself and no one is going to do it for you. You kind of have to take the bull by the horns and say I’m taking charge. It’s like when I decided, you know what, I am going to go ahead and plan this summit. I’m going to do it. I don’t know how to do marketing. I don’t know what a funnel is. I will figure it out. Like if I went to medical school and became a board certified physician, surely I can figure out how to plan a summit. 

And you know what? There are women who have done it and done it very well. And maybe if I reach out to them, they might be willing to help me in some capacity. And it’s like the same thing for the summit, carve the time out, come join us in Dallas. I promise that you will get something out of it. I just can’t imagine that if you come and be open and present, that you wouldn’t get anything out of the conference. It’s impossible. 

Bonnie: I wholeheartedly agree. And sometimes I’ll go to a conference thinking it’s for this thing, but I get something completely unrelated out of it. Like, I will say just, I mean, all the people I’ve met, including you, Tiffany, it’s like totally changed the trajectory of my life forever. 

Like Sonny and Peter and Leti and Kenji, we always talk about that, how just getting connected to each other and just the conversations, because Leti and Kenji, and actually even Peter tell me that they started online courses because I started an online course, right? And then we talked and I think I said, like, you should have a course. And then we all did courses and how that just totally changed and grew our businesses. And then I’m always having ideas for them and then they always have ideas for me. 

So just to have that, just say something that one day you’ll just be like, hey, you know what, I’m going to do this. And so I just know anyone attending Tiffany’s conference, or I just encourage anyone listening who feels that something is missing or it’s just like this isn’t the life that they want, go to a conference. 

And the good news is there is more than one conference available to attend all throughout the year, all different locations. So part of me is like, there really is no reason not to because you can find something that works for your time and schedule. 

So tell us the dates of yours and where is it? All the things. 

Tiffany: LeadHer Summit is going to be in Dallas from November 8th through 10th. The programming starts Friday morning and goes until Sunday at noon. So people can catch flights and things and get back to their regularly scheduled programming. 

We’re still working out the fine tuning of the program, but we have the list of speakers on the website, and there’s going to be an amazing swag bag. 

Bonnie: The best part, right? 

Tiffany: I may be raffling off a Birkin. Cindy Bay was like, are you kidding me? She was like, you’re kidding, right? And I was like, no, like this is a conference – Can I cuss on this podcast? I’m going to cuss. This is a conference for bad bitches. And if you’re not a bad bitch, if you’re a basic bitch, don’t come. That’s okay. 

I say the word bitch like in the most loving way, you know, in a jovial kidding sort of manner. But I was thinking every bad bitch needs a Birkin and I’m going to give you one. So at the LeadHer Summit, I will be raffling off one of my personal Birkins from my personal collection. She is sitting in my closet right now. She’s been used a few times, but all my bags are in really great condition, because I want somebody to win a Birkin. 

Bonnie: So Tiffany, some people might not know what a Birkin is. 

Tiffany: Oh, well, I’m going to make an online course to teach you about Hermes Birkins. It’s a handbag. It’s probably the most highly coveted handbag, arguably, in the world, I would say. At the end of the day, it’s just a bag. It carries your stuff. It’s not that serious. But people have entire blogs dedicated to how to buy one. On the resale market they resell for like two to three times what they were the year before. So it’s an investment. 

Bonnie: I was going to say, so it actually is an investment. 

Tiffany: So yes, I said earlier in the podcast that I don’t know much about investments, but I would like to retract that statement because all of my investments are sitting in my closet as we speak. 

Bonnie: That’s hysterical. I know what a Birkin is. I never quite understood why people were so crazy about it, but that could be a whole nother podcast. 

Tiffany: Yeah. It’s the rarity, the exclusivity, the same reasons that men like tech watches and Ferraris. It’s that same luxury thing. We can have a whole nother side discussion on that. Maybe at the summit we’ll have a little side session on why Birkins are so coveted. 

Bonnie: What color is the Birkin you’re giving away? 

Tiffany: That’s a good question. I was asking my friend this and I was like, should I do a basic color like a taupe or black? Because I have two black Birkins, one has gold hardware and one has silver hardware. Or should I do a fun color like pink or orange or something like that? So I haven’t decided which Birkin I’m going to raffle off, but there will be one. 

Bonnie: Oh, definitely a colorful one, I think. 

Tiffany: Okay. Okay. 

Bonnie: Yeah, make it like a statement, you know? 

Tiffany: Yeah. Well, I have like six pink Birkins. So surely I can find one shade of pink to raffle off. 

Bonnie: Okay, there was something I was going to say that we got off tangent with the Birkin. Oh, about your conference, the swag. Was there anything else you wanted to say about that? 

Tiffany: No. I mean, I just want people to know that I really am putting a lot of effort into this conference because I want to make it amazing. My name is on the line. And yeah, I promise you that if you come, you will get something out of it. Maybe a Birkin.

Bonnie: Yeah. Oh, I remember now. Yeah, maybe a Birkin. At the very least maybe a Birkin that you can turn around and two X in a year. 

Tiffany: Yeah, exactly.

Bonnie: I was going to say that when you told me that it starts, you said Friday afternoon? 

Tiffany: Friday morning. 

Bonnie: Friday morning. Yeah, so you really don’t have to take that much time off. 

Tiffany: Right. Like you should probably fly in on Thursday, right? Because the programming starts Friday at like 9am, so you need to be there by then. You can’t fly in on Friday. I mean, you can fly in on Friday. You know, you don’t have to attend the whole thing. We’re not selling day tickets. I’ve gotten a couple of messages. It’s too hard for us to keep track of. And I want people to be there for the whole thing, you know? 

Bonnie: Yeah. 

Tiffany: But yeah, get in on Thursday, fly to Dallas. It’s in the middle of the country. So New York, I mean, East coast people, West coast people, it’s a three hour flight. It’s at my husband’s new hotel that just opened. It’s beautiful. I am feeding you because I have been to conferences where there was no food or the food was terrible. And I’m like, I’m not doing that. 

I mean, the cost of the tickets that you see on the website is so high, mostly because I’m feeding you the whole time that you’re there. And we have an amazing Saturday night gala. I was telling one of my girlfriends about it and she goes, I think your conference gala is going to be nicer than my wedding reception. And I was like, oh, well, I don’t know. You know, it’s a Tiffany Moon conference, so what can I say? It’s going to have a Tiffany Moon flavor to it. 

Bonnie: Yeah, that’s so funny. But yes, as someone who has a conference too, the food costs are astronomical. I had no idea. When I did my first conference and I saw the cost of the food and then they add all that service fee and taxes on top, like another 18 or 19%, I was like, coffee is how much per person? 

Tiffany: No, to have water, coffee and a few soft drinks out all day is like $64 per person. Like for the whole day, it’s a beverage package. 

Bonnie: It’s insane. 

Tiffany: I’m like, are you kidding me? Like I’ll just bring my own water bottles from home and set them on a table. And they’re like, you can’t bring outside food. And I was like, dammit. I am getting a little bit of pushback about the price, but I’m like, I promise you guys the price is very accommodating because I’m paying a lot of money to have the conference. 

Bonnie: Yeah. It’s like a wedding. Like people know when you have a wedding, like the cost “per head” for the reception is whatever. And that’s just like one food event. So yeah, no, I get it. Like I remember seeing the bill for my first, even like 10 person retreat and just like the cost of the food was insane. 

But I agree, I hate going to conferences where there’s like nothing and you’re just starving and you know, then you have to sneak out and buy a bar or something like that, you know? 

Tiffany: Right, exactly. So I’m really being thoughtful about the way I’m planning the conference and how I want the attendees to feel. And I want everyone to feel taken care of because mostly I think the people that are going to be coming are working women, maybe some with families. And I feel like we run around all day long taking care of other people. And I’m like, can we now focus on you? 

So all you have to do is carve the time out, come and be present, we will take care of everything else. 

Bonnie: Yes, no, I love that, 100%. All right, Tiffany, what tip or advice do you want to share that we haven’t talked about yet? 

Tiffany: I think the general message that I want to share with your listeners is that if you want to do something and it’s nagging you in the back of your head, but you have doubts, just do it. I never thought I would be an “influencer” or a real housewife or be planning my own summit. I never thought any of these things when I graduated from residency and started as an attending. 

But I’ve done and am doing all of these things and it’s brought so much connection and joy to me because I’m talking to people like you and Sonny and countless other people that are helping me. And it’s really enriched the fabric of my life. And now I can’t imagine just being an anesthesiologist. That sounds terrible to me. 

So if you have something that you want to do, I say take a leap of faith and go for it. 

Bonnie: Yeah, 100%. And I know it feels scary. So it’s like what’s one little thing that you can do even today to forward whatever that sort of dream might be? Because that’s really, if you think of all the achievements we have or anything that we’ve accomplished, it’s like a summation of like hundreds and thousands of little actions that we take. 

So thank you so much for being here, Tiffany. 

Tiffany: Thank you for having me. 

Bonnie: I’m super excited, can’t wait to see you in Dallas, although I’m going to be seeing you pretty soon, before that obviously. 

Tiffany: Yeah. 

Bonnie: All right, how can people find you? I’m on all the social media platforms at Tiffany Moon MD, LeadHer Summit is LeadHer, which is a play on the word leader, but it’s LeadHer Summit, which is November 8th through 10th in Dallas. And I really, really hope that you guys can make it. 

Bonnie: All right. Thanks so much for being here, Tiffany. 

Tiffany: Thanks for having me. 

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