191: How to Reflect on the past Year & Why It’s Important

Welcome to the Wealthy Mom MD Podcast, a podcast for women physicians who want to learn how to live a wealthy life. In this podcast you will learn how to make money work for you, how you can have more of it, and learn the tools to empower you to live a life on purpose. Get ready to up-level your money and your life. I’m your host, Dr. Bonnie Koo.

Welcome to episode 191. So, it is that time of the year every year where people are winding down. And I was going to say thinking about how the year went, but mainly I feel like a lot of people, including myself, we’re just kind of mailing it in. We’re like, okay, I’ll get re-motivated in January. 

Now, I am going to talk about that in January, about how I want you to think about goals and blah, blah, blah, because I know that’s something we all do, including me. And I will say a year-end reflection is something that I really don’t see a lot of people doing because, again, maybe we don’t want to, maybe we don’t really want to think about it because we’re probably only going to think about the things that we didn’t do or things that we didn’t like, et cetera. And we kind of shove it under the carpet and just have a clean slate in January. And I want to implore you not to do that. 

So this episode is coming out at the beginning of December, and I did that on purpose because if I did this episode the last week of the year, you definitely wouldn’t do this. Plus, you’re going to be busy with all of your holiday stuff, and maybe you’ll even be away. 

So this is actually the best time to reflect on the year, whether it’s – Actually I think right after Thanksgiving is probably the best time. Doing a reflection also gives you really, really valuable information on how you want to move forward. But what I think is most important about this is that it’s an opportunity to take stock of what you did accomplish and appreciate all the goodness that happened this year, because I know for sure there is so much goodness you can reflect on. 

And, of course, it’s an opportunity to reflect on any lessons learned. And it’s less about what you regret, et cetera. And there’s nothing wrong with spending time regretting something. Basically, it’s a form of a wish that went differently, whether it’s something you had a direct part of or not. Because I think that is important as well. But you don’t have to do it in a way where you’re just constantly berating yourself and feeling crappy about yourself, which is why so many of us just avoid doing it. 

There’s an order to do things, and I’ve talked about this before, it’s really important to start with what went well, what you’re happy about, et cetera before moving on to what did I learn? What are some things that I wish I did differently? The reason why this order is important is because it puts your mindset and your emotions in a more, well, not just positive, but also way more neutral. And what that means is that when you do start exploring what you did learn and what you wish went differently, that neutral mindset is critical for you to see things as objectively as possible. 

Now, one of the things I’ve talked about in the past is by giving the year a title. Think of it as like the title of a chapter in your life, because that’s really what it is, right? And you get to decide what the title is. And you get to decide what’s in that chapter in terms of the story of the version that you’re telling yourself. Because it’s a story and it’s a version. However you think the truth is, we’re all creating stories about our lives. 

So I have two things that I recommend that you do a reflection. The first is most of us take a gazillion pictures, myself included. And so I want you to spend some time, I doubt it’s going to take more than 20 or 30 minutes, going through the pictures you took this year and creating a highlight reel, literally, or just create another album, Best of 2023. 

And if you have an iPhone, there are fancy ways, I’m sure it’s like this on Android, but you can literally have the phone make a little video of those pictures. I mean it’s pretty cool, right? And so if you do that, then you can also save that video as well. 

And I think this is such a great way to reflect on the year for you to see all the amazing memories that you’ve created. Because generally speaking, we don’t take pictures of crappy things that are happening to us, right? So usually the pictures are all good stuff. Or they could just be capturing a moment, like taking a picture of food, which I definitely do a lot. 

And I’ve actually thought about this. I’m like why do I take pictures of food because I literally never look at them again. Like never. But in the moment, it seems like a good idea. So I actually feel like I may stop doing that because what’s the point? Like I’ll post them on my Instagram story because they just disappear, but I don’t really want to save a picture on my phone. 

The second thing I have for you is that I actually have created a list of journaling prompts, questions to ask yourself to think about the year. Basically, end of the year reflection prompts, and we’ve created a nice workbook for you so you can download it, print it out, or if you’re someone who likes to do things electronically, either way it will work. 

And so if you want to grab the end of the year reflections, go to wealthymommd.com/reflection. Again, that’s wealthymommd.com/reflections. And if you’re on this podcast episode, wherever you’re listening to the app, you can go to the link there to grab your copy. 

And so if you choose to get this workbook, which I highly recommend that you do, then I want to make sure you actually do it, right? You actually have to spend time filling out the questions. I really would set aside an hour to do this. And I really want you to spend time going deep and filling it out, because what you write here is going to be, again, like I said, so useful and valuable, it’s going to help inform you on how you want to move forward, which is what we all spend January doing, right? 

So I just want to give you some of my reflections from my personal and my business life. And for these reflections, I’m mainly just reflecting on how I spent my time. So this year, personally, I definitely focused a lot more on my relationships, particularly with my family. I work with a parent coach, I had her on the podcast not too long ago. 

Jack has needed some extra support this year and so I’ve been spending so much more time and attention making sure he gets what he needs. And also just being frankly grateful that I have the ability and the time and the resources to give him the help that he needs. 

Matt and I also started seeing a marriage therapist, and that was really instigated not so much like an incident, but some close friends of mine have been working on their relationships, some had something really tragic happen and some just felt like their marriage was kind of like blah. And another couple, they’ve always worked on the relationship actively. 

And that’s, honestly, one of the reasons, probably the main reason as they love talking about it, why their marriage is so successful. And so it’s interesting, right? I’m pretty open about the support that I get and I definitely noticed that when I mentioned that we have a marriage therapist, marriage counselor, whatever you want to call it, we’re not married, but same difference, people automatically think there must be something wrong with the relationship. 

But how I treat, you know, how I talk about coaching or any other therapy, it’s really to uplevel your life. All relationships take work. They all require time and attention. And your intimate partner/spouse is arguably probably the most important relationship in your life. So wouldn’t you want to do what you can to make it so much better? 

So it has been really great and really eye-opening. And again, I think whenever you take the time, attention and money to focus on something, so much growth happens. 

Now one thing that didn’t get done is working on my physical fitness. I am pretty sedentary. And it has literally been on my to-do list constantly to create some kind of fitness plan. Now, of course, it didn’t just happen that I didn’t get it done, but it’s definitely something that I keep saying I want to do, but I don’t do it. And so that’s something I’m going to have to examine. 

Specifically, I really want to be working out regularly in terms of weight training, taking walks every morning, things like that. And so that’s something that I need to work on. 

Now, some reflections in my business is that this year I was a lot less focused on a money goal. And I think in the past I’ve been too focused on that. And kind of like I said in a previous podcast about maximum life enjoyment, I’ve been using this principle in my business as well, right? 

Because a business does make money, and if you’re solely focused on becoming a – In the coaching world, making seven figures is like one of the coveted milestones, then you kind of miss out on the whole point of having a business, especially having a business that you love that really works with the way you want to live your life. 

And so no surprise that when I was less focused about money and more focused about creating a business that I love, and creating products and services that I know are so needed, I have made the most money this year in my business. This year I created a money conference for women it’s actually not being delivered until March of 2024 

But this is the year that I finally said I’m going to do it, I’m going to create it. And we sold it. And it sold out really fast, which means we could probably have a lot more people next year. And at the time of this recording, we don’t have a contract signed, but we are in contract for the 2025 conference, it’s going to be in February. I don’t remember the dates off the top of my head. But when we do have a contract signed, I will tell you more about it. 

I know it’s super far in the future. And I also know that you all love to have things planned in the future, especially for things like this, where you’re going to have to take time off from work. It’s going to be at an amazing, amazing place, okay? 

I also spent time keeping in the theme of creating a business that I love. I hired an amazing assistant. And even though she’s one person, I basically call her my team. And my team is not just her, right? It’s also my podcast editor, my Facebook ads person, my CFO/bookkeeper. 

But I feel like this year I’ve really created an amazing team and my assistant has simplified my life so much because I was really spending time stuck in the weeds of my business and not spending time doing the things only I can do. The thinking, the creating, the coaching. If you’re a physician, think about how you’re not really able to see patients because you’re stuck being the office manager, the MA, the bookkeeper, et cetera. 

That’s how it was for me for a certain period of time, and I was burned out. And so I finally am really thrilled with what I’ve created so far. And I’m so much happier as a result. 

And, of course, there are things about my business that I wish went differently and things that I would do differently and things that I’ve learned as well. That’s just a little peek into some of my reflections and taking account as to how this year went, and I really hope you do the same. 

Don’t forget to get the year-end, end of the year reflections, rather. It is wealthymommd.com/reflections or just go to where you’re listening to this podcast and you should see a link for that. You also could just go to wealthymommd.com/191 and you’ll see the link there to grab your year-and reflection workbook. 

All right. I hope you’re all having an amazing start of the month and the end of the year as well. See you next week.

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